Freitag, 6. April 2018

Epilog of a shattered Poem

Whatever you think, where I lead to, where it leads to, maybe it's decieving, you are a gift since I know you. Since I know you, I carry happiness in my look. I am your seventh sense, your double ground, your second face, you are a wise prognosis, the principle of hope, an illuminated ray in the night. Love is a piece of candy and dissolves very slowly, a small nutrition value remains of it and you accept the pain. Love is made from concret and you build houses on it, a palace, a parlor - then you look up to it. Love is a small animal, maybe it runs away one day. You ask in the animal shelter: "Do you have another one like that?" And then there's none. Love is a vampire and a tender murder, a cruise ship made out of paper, with a man overboard. On a sandbank in the ocean I stand now and I can see everything from here, you know even till the ground. I clear the fog, change as fast as I can and what doesn't change, I still try to change. Stick to the stars until one of them falls down. One which rips my chest open. I don't hesitate for long, I set the sails, bag the moon for you, cut the cables want to be alone with you and if you do nothing for me, then you're good at it. I see that you're thinking. I think that you're feeling. I feel that you're willing but I don't hear you. I borrowed a dictionar, shouted A to Z into your ear. I pile up thousands of confusing words that pull your sleeve and where you want to go. I hang on to your legs and besides, if you have to fall on your mouth why not fall on mine? Fetch the sledge. They've built a monument for us and every idiot knows that this spoils the love. I will hire the worst sprayers of the town, they should yet daub the rubblet with paroles of the youth at night. Get up, come to me here. It will soon dawn and we don't have much time. If someone catches us here now, we're united forever in concrete and bliss. I can't see anymore, I put no trust in my eyes anymore, can hardly believe anymore - feelings have turned around. I'm much too lazy to give up. Would be too early anyway, because something always works out. We were conspired, would have died for each other, bowed the rain, lent each other trust. We tried to reverse, full speed down hill. Nothing was too late - but a lot was too early. We pushed each other through all the tides, we frittered, loved each other desperately. We lied about the truth as good as possible. It was a piece of heaven - that you were there. Men take you in their arms. Men give comfort. Men cry secretly. Men need a lot of tenderness and men are so vulnerable. Men buy women. Men are always on the run. Men flirt like crazy. Men lie on the telephone. Men are ready all the time. Men captivate with their money and nonchalance. Men have a hard life, but take it easy. Hard on the outside, soft at the inside. As children, they're already groomed to turn into men. When is a man a man? Men have muscles. Men are so strong. Men can do everything. Men get a heart attack and men are lonely fighters. Have to get through every wall, always have to keep going. Men wage wars. Men smoke pipe. Men get no children. Men get thin hair. Man are so vulnerable. When is a man a man? I am one of your colours. You can choose them. You can wear them. You can bleach them. I tell you all the secret numbers. Will paint out the most daring dreams to you. I'll explain to you, all of whatever I don't understand myself. Whatever you think, where I lead to. Where it leads to, maybe it's decieving. You are a gift since I know you. Since I know you, I carry happiness in my look. I climb up, stones are rolling, they fall on you, you see them coming, you don't dodge. You thought you could catch them, you grab for my hand, we sink into the sand, I hold you as good as I can, but we don't progress. You look at my face , I see everything but you, together alone because we have no common ground to share. The trail behind us is what holds us together, but even this will fall into ruin someday, I know that the ground is breaking under us. I can't do with or without you. I am your seventh sense, your double ground, your second face, you are a safe prognosis, the principle of hope, an illuminated ray in the night. Life is running red in our veins, I serve it to you on a golden tray. You get me out of the grey valley of tears. You let all miracles happen at once, so that I become unable to hear and see. You got me entangled in a silky net, Life is shrewd, but not now, it finally gets wings, flies away, those are your eyes - so green and so pious and you laugh and shine, you have a sense of humor. (You) Give me tears of joy and (you) take none of them back, and you do nothing to me and you're good at it. You flooded every room with sunshine, converted every displeasure into its opposite. Nordic noble - your gentle kindness, your irrepressible proudness... Life is pretty much not fair. Danced the movie in a silver room, admired infinity from the golden balcony. Hopelessly sunk, drunk and everything was permitted. Together in a time lapse. Midsummernight's dream. Whatever you think, where I lead to, where it leads to, maybe it's decieving. You are a gift since I know you. Since I know you, I carry happiness in my look. And of course, when I am alone, I lock the door. And yes, when I drive my bike, I drive with a light. I miss a few things, but in exchange I found others. So, do not worry. And during thunderstorms I don't go bathing in the lake. And during storms I don't swim too far away. And I avoid the oaks and i try to find my equal among the others. I am your seventh sense, your double ground, your second face, one favourite colour, your most sportive car, your deepest dive, your glider flight, you are a good prognosis, the principle of hope, an illuminated ray from the night. You had cooked, we had stones for dinner. They are lying in my stomach now. They are heavy, I am alone. Please who's cuttin me open. This game is new. You're numb and I am cold, my heart full, my head empty. Yesterday it was the other way around. You're as high as a bird at the horizon. I look at you while getting closer, see how you are and how we are. And that we're not happy. We walk a while from side to side and we realize it was the perfect happiness and what remains is a feverish dream - but we are real. I can't do with or without you. But above all - not without you. And if someday your head becomes to tight and dark for you and you feel that the rain heads back, I'll paint all of your colors, all of your vows. You're all in all - that's not what you are. It's crazy, how nice you keep quiet and how you turn your pretty head, this way giving the whole world and me your cold shoulder. Your silence is your shell, your tent, you put it in the middle of the world, put the strings and wonder quietly when in the middle of a night a boy trips over them. To your feet I talk too much, I want to make bigger waves in your deep waters. In my blood, the endorphines go crazy, when behind your quiet bunny-eyes the thoughts are racing. I don't go away, I extended my term. New time travel, open world. I have you safely in my soul. I'll carry you with me until the curtain falls. I'll carry you with me until the curtain falls.